Therefore We Do Not Lose Heart

Eli and Tricia

I love being a stay-at-home Mom.  I’ve always felt that it is what I was created to do.  After fourteen years of this most amazing adventure, I wouldn’t change a thing.

However, I must admit that, after all this time, I thought I would be working myself out of a job.  Instead, it has become even more demanding.  I’m not complaining, but it has required me to do “a little improv”, as John likes to say.

I have felt discouraged for a while.  It has taken me many months to get to a point where I can finally see the light.  I know now that I will always, eventually, get to that point.  I used to get stuck in a pit of depression that I couldn’t climb out of on my own.  Now I know that all of God’s promises are true, and quite often, it is Eli who will remind me of those promises.

The Hard Work

The last nine months have meant hard work for Eli.  The Family Hope Center program is meant to address all areas of his brain injury treatment.  A typical day includes:

Creeping and crawling (and lots of it) – This is so good for brain development!

Oxygenation – Through masks and hyperbaric oxygen treatments.

Reflex integration – To pattern dysfunctional reflexes into higher brain stages.

Olfactory program – Smelling things!  We’re trying to stimulate his sense of smell which is connected to memory function.

Inversion table – We call it the Teeter board.

Intellectual program – This is what we call school!

Wasting Away

Several days ago, I took Eli shopping to get some new clothes.  It has been a long while since he’s had new clothes.  Even though he has grown some in height, his waist has only gotten smaller.  So, as I helped him try on several pairs of pants and shorts, I noticed how small he really is.  His muscles are tight and they pull his legs so that they are always bent.

There was a part of me that wanted to cry out for help.  I wanted to sound an alarm!  Doesn’t anyone else see this?  Why isn’t all of his hard work producing results?  He’s wasting away….

I tried not to let on to Eli that I was feeling so alarmed.  But I’m afraid it turned my mood pretty sour.  On the way home, he asked if we could get a treat.  Who am I to say “no” to comfort food?!  So we stopped to get cookies at McDonald’s.

I didn’t sleep well that night.  The next morning, I talked to John about my concerns.  He let me get it out and have a good cry.

Later in the morning, I was sitting in the same room with Eli as he was doing his Bible study.  After he reads his Bible, he does a devotional reading from Sarah Young’s teen edition of “Jesus Calling”.  He looks up the Bible verse associated with the daily reading.

Excitedly Eli said, “Mom, this Bible verse is absolutely true!  Do you want to hear it?!”

I said, “Of course I do!”  He read enthusiastically:

Therefore we do not lose heart.  Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” – 2 Corinthians 4: 16-17 (emphasis mine)

You’re right, Eli.  That is absolutely true.

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  • Kelly Combs

    I love that verse, Tricia. It was my husband’s and my go-to verse when he was battling cancer. We Christians are all heading toward the same destiny – eternal life with Jesus. That is why we do not lose hope. Great post.

    • Tricia Tiller

      Thank you, Kelly! Your faith shines through every one of your FB posts. Thank you for being open with your feelings. You are surely helping many people.

  • Philipp Knoll

    Tricia, I just found your blog through your husbnd engaging on Michael Hyatt’s website. I’m sorry your family had such hard time but am absolutely excited for how you managed to turn it all into such a positive journey of growth. I admire you for that. Thanks for sharing your story – I love this verse.

    Give my blessings to Eli!

    • Tricia Tiller

      Thank you, Philipp! Blessings to you, too!

  • Shelley Cloninger Wade

    Tricia, just as Philipp did I too just stumbled upon your website via Michael Hyatt’s. This is the first blog i read and I couldn’t help but have tears in my eyes as a sly smile inched across my face. It never ceases to amaze me how God speaks to his children. Why was it that verse on that day using those same exact words and directly from your amazing son? There really is no such thing as coincidence – it’s a “God thing”. You have a beautiful family and I appreciate the willingness to share your story with the world – bringing a message of hope and the power of the Cross. May God continue to strengthen each of you and bring you many blessings as you continue on this journey!

    • Tricia Tiller

      Thank you, Shelley. I appreciate your thoughts and comments. It definitely was a “God thing”. Blessings to you!